Letting Go When All Is Sorted Out And All The Truth Is Known!

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For many letting go is the only option. To resolve an issue at any point of our lives when we know there aren't many options, we make ourselves believe that its now the time to move on without going any further into the details of the issue. Whether it be a loved one cheating on you, or it be a failure in your plans, someone's death or may be someone's absence from our lives. Losing confidence that we can't make things better with all the facts and truths in our haands we end up accepting the scenario as it is. Because we know they somewhere in the mind our loved ones have already given a reason to our sufferings.

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Like when my mother passed away I questioned myself why did it happen to me? Why couldn't she recover from her illness like others usually do? But in the end and even now what I do to make myself better is that I raise an argument with in that she's better off dead. She might have had a bad life ahead, she would have been bed-ridden or worse of she was alive. Yet I am not satisfied because I know things could also be different than this.

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There are those too who cheat on their spouse, they might be sorry later on but they know they have damaged the other person a bit too deeply. At many points later in their lives though the guilt would constantly nag them, they'll fail to accept it. On the other hand the victim of the cheating/hurting episode might have accepted the situation and moved on with life yet when alone something, most probably the gut would shout thousands of doubts and reasoning with in the head. No doubt on many such days they still prefer to let it go, on the other hand all this will keep on disturbing them throughout the life.

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My point here is that what makes us go through this jeopardy of letting go? Why is it that we stop going deeper into the base of an issue to resolve it and try ending it when still on the surface?  I feel its like a person suffers from brain tumor and the doctor keeps him on paracetamol to diminish the pain! Why do we think that our problems will be sorted out by simply letting go without knowing the basis of these problems.

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Death of people we are closer to also leave us abandoned and deeply confused. But death makes things complicated as we can't still talk to the person who left us. On the other hand death teaches us a deeper lesson than any of the other relationship hurts. We should learn out of our loved one's death that we must make other relationships in our lives stronger and deeper. we must try not to come to a point where letting go is the only remaining option.

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We need to go deeper, talk about the details, know why it happened, accept if we are the culprits and then only we must agree that this had to happen according to our destiny.  But blaming destiny with out knowing the reasons to the bad things happening to us will only make us more uneasy and depressed.

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So now the next time your significant other hurts you or cheats on you and you both aren't ready to leave each other, just don't let it go. Sit and talk to each other openly and in detail. Realize why you were hurt and then accept each other's weakness that hurt both the parties, then only let it go. Have peace at your heart and the brain too! Just try to add in all the truth in your relationships and diminish all the lies because it's something that'll surely help you live a peaceful life; truth may hurt for a while but lies hurt forever!

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Remember there are rights and wrongs in every relationship, people come in your life, people leave you for good and for bad, and some people just leave the world leaving you all alone. The wrongs and rights that we share with these people are what defines our relationship with them. If the wrongs weren't meant to hurt you intentionally, let them them go and if the rights were hurting you in the long run, try to work things out. Because we live our lives once, and we should not only make it perfect for us, we must also try our best to make it memorable for others, as in the end only memories stay behind!

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A FAVOR A DAY KEEPS THE MONOTONY AWAY!

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Over the last few days I made phone calls to my husband plus some text messages just to randomly tell him how much I love him and how important he is. This not only helped us rebound, I also noticed a difference in his mood. He seemed happier, cheerful and content. He also got me flowers one day. 

I realize that this really worked plus I didn't know how important were these small presents to keep the spark alive until he gave me the flowers when I was least expecting. After realizing what affect this small favor had on me I knew it had the power to add charm and spark to the relation.

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Presenting gifts and doing favors for others has always created a positive vibe among people. The gifts or favors do not have to be something big or too expensive. Even the smallest of gift a d favors can have biggest of impacts only if they have the purest intentions behind them!

My husband has given me flowers on many occasions, birthdays,anniversaries or even on the birth of my daughter. though I love flowers and they always make me happy, but getting them when I least expected made me happier!

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So for a change lets start presenting our loved ones with small favors whether it be a flower, a small gift, a favor, anything that will make our significant one happier and revive the charm in our married life.

A FAVOR A DAY KEEPS THE MONOTONY AWAY!

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Okay, so let's list out all the small favors that can add spark to our marriage:

1. Presenting a flower to your partner for no reason might be a very small gesture but it has huge amount of worth. so next time when you come home, get her a flower. or the next time you set breakfast table, keep flowers for him on the table.

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2. Unexpected help in household chores can really do a lot for all the ladies. So dear husbands, washing dishes after the dinner or spreading out the laundry won't harm you; it will only make your wives happier presenting you as a more charismatic husband. Plus doing things together will help you both spend time together.

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3. Darling wives, let's do our husbands a favor by presenting a beautiful lady when they get back home. Wait a minute guys! don't get too happy, we will present ourselves as those beautiful ladies!

so ladies, you know when your husbands return home, let's get up and dress up beautifully for our men, like we did on our dates before getting into this auspicious relationship.

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4. You need to go get small presents at least once a month. Save money specially for buying these gifts. give your spouse a small pendant or may be as small a gift as a card that'll remind her or him how important they are. buy anything and give it with a simple peck or a tight hug and see how it creates magic between you two.

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5. Making bed work wonders. The next time when your spouse goes to the washroom in the morning try to make bed before their return and she the pleasure on their faces. Or maybe before your spouse comes to bedroom to sleep at night, make the bedroom nicely prepared. switch on the night lamp, spread out the quilt ready to use, keep their night dress ready, just do any of these or all of these if you have enough time and energy and the spark radiating from them!

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Reviving Things That'll Bring a Spark in Your Marriage! - PHONE CALL

So is your relationship out of the charming phase, as in is it long since you both are together? Don't worry I ain't invading your privacy, it's a question I want all of us to find answers for making our lives better. 

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As relationships get older, couples start getting comfortable with each other and in that comfort zone, the issues come to life! By issues I mean things, small and big, that affect our marriage. Getting comfortable with each other means getting lesser and lesser careful about each other. Wait a second, don't jump to conclusions so early, i never mean careless in its real meaning! By being careless, here, I mean that once we know that we are with our loved ones, that now we are together there is nothing that can change this fact, in fact we start believing that there is nothing that can harm our marriage. We become careless in a sense that we stop focusing on things that we earlier practiced to get our lovers into our lives, into a relationship as beautiful as marriage. 

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For going deeper into this, let's focus on how and in what ways we were different prior to tying the sacred knot? 

In the phase where we tried attracting each other, we made sure to present the best of ourselves! from looking good, to behaving in the most decent manner possible, from focusing on our careers to doing everything that pleased the once we love, each of us in that phase tried our best attain all the qualities that our lover likes and which will make them love us even more. With time and with marriage, when we consider this bond to be so strong and so sacred that it can never be damage, we with our carelessness start damaging it ourselves, and many of us just loose the very essence of love from our marriage.

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Like all people I too go through ups and downs in my married life, so I thought I'll start doing things step by step that will rejuvenate my marriage and by sharing it with you I'm pretty sure my readers' relationship will also regain the spark and these simple spices will add more taste to the recipes of our marriages/relationships!

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Here's the first thing that I'll change and let's see how it improves my relationship:

 A SIMPLE PHONE CALL

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How many of us still call our partners just to say Hi or just to tell them the 10000th time that we love them? I know many of us still do this on our anniversaries or may be birthdays, but do we still do this as frequently as we did this in the charming phase? Lets see why most of us call our significant others now. We call our husbands to ask when they'll be home, or is the last night's plan still on, or maybe to ask them to get the dresses from dry cleaners on way back to home. while the husbands usually call to ask what they'll be getting for dinner or may be just to know if the wives need anything so that they can get it while coming to home.  

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Though this shows our affection for each other in its unique way, yet it lacks the affection that's needed to revive the spark in our relationship. 

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So let's all of us add a simple phone call in our routines. From tomorrow let's make it a must to call our partner just to say Hi or just to let them know in a simple and clearer way that we still love them as we loved them in the beginning and that they still are as important and dear to us as they were when we first met!

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After practicing this small change, I'll surely be sharing the results with you all, you too feel free to write your experience in the comments box and let us all know how it changed things for you so that it keeps all of us motivated!

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"Toast to the new, better and happier version of our old lives!"